A Christmas for Research Nerds

A few weeks we wrote about launching surveys over holidays, and we quoted research noting that there is scant evidence for the widespread assumption that holidays periods should be avoided.

Lest you now find yourself working over the Christmas holiday trying to squeeze in the last round of data collection getting input from every last respondent, here is a small gift that I hope will lighten your day.

Several years ago a colleague who specialized in phone interviews wrote a short telephone survey script for the night before Christmas and shared it with us. Thank you, Mitch – this brings a smile to my face every year!

‘Twas the Night Before Christmas . . .

Hello, this is [NAME OF INTERVIEWER] from [NAME OF ORGANIZATION], an opinion research organization. Tonight we’re calling people across the country to find out what’s going on in their homes on the night before Christmas. Please rest assured that this is not a sales call, and that everything you tell us will be kept confidential. Would you be willing to participate?

Yes (CONTINUE)
No (THANK AND TERMINATE)

Q1 First of all, have you noticed any creatures stirring in your house tonight?

Yes (SKIP TO Q3)
No
DON’T KNOW (SKIP TO Q3)
REFUSED (SKIP TO Q3)

Q2 Not even a mouse? (DO NOT READ LIST)

YES, NOTICED MOUSE STIRRING
NO, NOT EVEN A MOUSE
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q3 Have you hung any stockings by your chimney?

Yes
No (SKIP TO Q6)

Q4 How much care did you use in hanging the stockings by the chimney? Please rate it on a scale from 0 to 10, where 0 means “no care at all” and 10 means “extreme care.”

0
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q5 What would you say was the single main reason you hung stockings by the chimney? Was it:

In the hope that Santa Claus would drop in
To dry them after you had to walk home through a series of deep snowdrifts
They had developed runs, so there was no other use for them, or
Some other reason (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q6 As far as you know, what visions have your children experienced in bed tonight? (RANDOMIZE)

(NO CHILDREN)
Barbie dolls
GI Joes
Chatty Cathys
Sugar plums
Betsy Wetsys
Cabbage Patch Kids
Tickle Me Elmos
Easy Bake Ovens
Candy canes
Radio Flyers
Fruitcake
Red Ryder BB guns
Other (if “yes” go to Q6a, otherwise skip to q7)

Q6a What other visions? (PROBE AND CLARIFY)

DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q7 Have you tried to get any sleep so far tonight?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q8 Were you awakened from your sleep at any time tonight?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q9 What woke you up? (READ LIST)

A loud noise outside the house
A loud noise inside the house
Indigestion from something you ate at the office party earlier today
Something else (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q10 What did you do after you woke up? (READ LIST)

Got up to see what was going on
Shrugged it off and went back to sleep
Something else (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q11 What did you notice after that?

A sleigh pulled by reindeer parked on the front lawn
A UPS truck that overturned after skidding on black ice on the street in front of your house
Several drunks who passed out on the lawn after leaving the party next door
Something else (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q12 Was Santa Claus with the sleigh and the reindeer?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q13 How many reindeer did you see?

(RECORD NUMBER)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q14 Did Santa mention any of them by name?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q15 Which reindeer do you recall him mentioning? (DO NOT READ LIST; MULTIPLE ANSWERS PERMITTED)

DASHER
DANCER
PRANCER
VIXEN
COMET
CUPID
DONNER
BLITZEN
OTHER (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q16 (ASK FOR EACH REINDEER NOT MENTIONED IN Q15)

Did Santa also mention [NAME OF REINDEER] by name?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q17 Did Santa move the sleigh anywhere after that?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q18 Where did he move it to?

The roof
The back yard
The alley behind the house
Somewhere else (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q19 Did Santa enter your house after that?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q20 How did he enter your house?

Through the front door
Through the back door
Through the chimney
Some other way (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q21 Can you describe Santa while he was in your house? (PROBE AND CLARIFY)

DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q22 Did you and he speak to each other while he was in the house?

Yes
No
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q23 Which of the following best describes what Santa Claus did while in your house?

Filled the stockings and then left
Filled the stockings, then ate your Christmas cookies, and then left
Filled the stockings, ate your Christmas cookies, polished off your eggnog, and left
Something else (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Q24 How did he leave your house?

Through the front door
Through the back door
Through the chimney
Some other way (SPECIFY)
DON’T KNOW
REFUSED

Thank you. Those are all the questions we have for you this evening. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night.

—Joe Hopper, Ph.D.